SAFE PLACES...

My mother in law, Muriel, was a safe place during the journey of cancer treatment.  She came into our home, took over when i couldn't with such grace and concern.  she looked after everyone while dad and Trace took cae of her responsibilities the other side.  Thank you Lord for her.

People are watching our lives whether we like to think about it or not.  And, by watching us they see the body of Christ at work… or not.  When we, the church, are a safe place for the hurting, He is glorified.

Safe places during cancer treatment became very important.  When we’re safe, we’re able to rest… to let down… to confess… to ask…share the load without fear of being condemned or judged.

Where were my safe places?

1.      In my Fathers presence.  He loves to hear what’s on our hearts and minds.   ‘do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition…. “.  I realize how much petition He heard on our behalf during that time of cancer treatment.  Phew.  It was so clear to me how we meet Jesus (our Maker) alone at the end of our lives on earth.  Just our faith, our journey, our walk,  our failures, our successes… is what we come to Him with.  We cannot rely on anyone elses.  The safety of being in my heavenly Fathers hands, allows me freedom to share my heart with Him. 

2.      Truth.  For me it feels safe when things are in the open.  When I don’t have to guess or wonder or try and read minds.  I remember a first lesson in this was when we were working in the NW Province.  A man was coming in for an HIV test… clearly with full-blown AIDS.  Two people had to just about carry him in.  We did the test, chatted and prayed.  He got his test result (positive of course) and he left… walking by himself and smiling.  Somehow the truth we’d talked about (physical and spiritual) made him stronger that day.  The people we were ministering with and alongside all knew what was going on.  So people were free to grab hold of me to say they were praying daily and be an ongoing encouragement. 

Truth from the Bible also brought direction, wisdom, hope, challenge at just the right times.  Though not all scripture shared was always helpful.  Though if it came from a safe place with love, it was almost always helpful.

3.  At home.  I felt safe in the familiar, the memories the space.  It wasn’t however always an emotionally safe place for Mark and the kids though… with me there to remind them of what we were dealing with.  I’m so thankful to others who provided safe places for them to let down.  I felt safe in my garden, when I was able to walk around it.  Experiencing the embrace of His creation always brought rays of sunshine into a grey place. 

4.      Safe People.  I am so thankful to the Lord for the many safe people He has put into our lives.  My heart bleeds for those who go through a hard time without safe places or people.  Cancer treatment is long though and hard for one person to cope with.  I found strength from different people at different times and for different things. 

I felt safe with people when I felt unjudged, loved, wanted, understood, included and asked.  When people asked me questions about what I was dealing with, what I needed or if a certain action would be helpful, it made me feel safe.  No mind reading, just open asking and sharing was so helpful.

What are your and my safe places?

Who are your and my safe people?

Are we being the safe places to others the Lord wants us to be?  In contemplating being a safe place for someone though, I do believe its good to count the cost first.  Starting and then withdrawing might be very hurtful.  Knowing that hard times and brokenness mean ‘sharp edges’ that might make the going unexpected or untidy.  Knowing that the long haul may be very long.  It might end in a place that you would not prefer.  And, knowing that its okay to not have answers many times for the one you want to be a support to. 

Oh the joy of the people who love us just as we are!!  One of my fondest memories is of my friend Andy.  I had no hair, was feeling so pale, had an awful headache and she quietly massaged my head for ages.  Oh, I felt so loved and treasured and so very, very safe.  Isn’t that such a lovely picture of the bond of the body of Christ.  Is the Lord not glorified by such simple actions prompted by love, one to another.  Oh let Him shine in us who love Him!

The 2nd of 3 talks shared at the 2013 ZEMA conference. I shared this after Mark shared from Job.